Relationships

Relationships are something that you need to work on. Whether they are with friends, family, significant others, on the professional level, teachers, whatever. You need to work to gain trust and respect, and you must work even harder to maintain that. Some people just don't want to work on their shit anymore. If you don't want to work, be courteous to those people who once had a relationship with you and tell them so you aren't stringing them on and having them continue to work when you just want to be lazy.

Where is alla this coming from? Where else, my relationship with Stan. He broke yet another promise. And for some reason, I didn't just end it like I said I would. But this is seriously it. I'm reaching a point of no return. If he breaks another promise, I will be done with him, with the heartbreak, with it all. I have it in writing now, so it's there. I gotta stick to my guns. If Stan's not willing to be real with me, I gotta be real with myself. We talked a bit this morning, and we semi solved some stuff. He doesn't wanna break up with me, but his actions are saying the exact opposite. He's pushing me away and he has no idea why. He wants to live his life like a "normal" 20 something would be. But he has to understand that he is not a normal 20 something anymore. He decided to be a cop and to have a career that would age him faster than he expected. He wants to be normal, then he needs to have a normal schedule. You can't expect to be normal if nothing around you is normal. Dear god, I'm the only thing constant he's had during alla this and he neglects me. I was there when his own parents didn't approve of his decision. I'm just done. I shouldn't cry every time I think of him. I shouldn't have grown used to broken promises. I'm over this. You gotta be strong baby girl. For yourself.

Now to find cars. There are some prospects today for two Miatas which I'd rather have. Then there's also a Geo tracker. I should get dressed. Ugh.