Just lovely.

Soo.. where to begin ? Let's start with yesterday, since something eventful happened. I went to Oakland for the usual hair appt. and had to be there at 6a.m. I was up at 5:15 for that, and as usual Joi was lagging. Omgah, I hate laggers. Anyway, we got there and went to McDonald's for the usual coffee before starting routine. I got another one of their hot mocha's. Those are surprsingly good to come from McDonald's. Mom made breakfast, so I didn't get my #2. Turns out her breakfast wasn't even all that good. I'm glad I brought my leftover Hawaiian for that day. Anyway, as I'm in process of getting a flat iron.. Zarr calls. Yay me. Turns out his mission is cancelled.. or it's postponed. Good news for me, I guess. It sucks b/c I've sent him some emails.. and he usually responds.. but he hasn't. I'm worried.

I'm tired of trying to impress Stan. I feel like nothing I do is good enough for you. I remember the whole argument we had when I was telling him I got a 'C' for my midterm grade in math and how he said that he couldn't be proud of me b/c the semester wasn't over. Today I told him my final grades, and the first thing outta his mouth was "That's the opposite of me." Wtf ? When he told me his, the first thing I said was I'm proud of you. Why can't you have the same respect for me as I do you ? You're very unecouraging sometimes. It makes me sad and it definitely pushes me away. I'm tired of pulling you back. I want you more than anything, but you gotta do some giving in this relationship. Do something sweet for me. Just ONE time. Why is that so hard ? Ugh. Anyway, I think he's upset at me now b/c I called him out on it. Don't be in the fuckin' kitchen if you can't handle the heat.

Now I'm upset. I'm hungry, but there really isn't anything good to eat in the house.

2m me and Stan are supposedly hanging out. I've learned to not get my hopes up about these things though. Shit always comes up with him, and then I wind up being upset. So.. I'll just let it play out.

Tuesday is Demonte's graduation. I told Stan, and i think he's possibly coming. Mom can't though, b/c she's going on a job interview. She's prolly gonna come with us to eat though. At least I hope so. I'm gonna be photographer though. I hate this shit.

Omgah, Uncle David, you need to be computer literate. Stop telling me that you're not ever gonna learn. Then don't come to me expecting me to help you do shit. Omgah, I can't wait to get outta here. Plus, alla these other uncle's of mine are rude. Rudy.. well let's just not talk about him. Robert comes around at like 2 a.m. screaming in the window of Uncle David for a cigarette. I'm just done with this house.

I wonder what it would be like...