I AM SO FREAKING EXCITED TO BE GOING TO DISNEYWORLD IN 13 DAYS!! I HONESTLY JUST WANT TO GO ON THIS TRIP ALREADY. AHHH!!!
I keep checking things, making sure things are right. Seeing if there are any super hidden things that I can discover for us to do. Looking in the area of our hotel for good eateries. Trying to look at our hotel to make sure that it's clean. Looking at Vasiliy's hotel to make sure it's nice. (Btw, he's staying at the PetSmart PetsHotel in San Carlos.) I keep fidgeting. I dislike how anxious I am. I want to be there already. I wanna see alla friendly faces of Disney characters, find some hidden Mickey's, find some hidden rooms, and drink around the world! I wanna relax in a nice bed, snuggle with my boyfriend, and fight over what to watch on tv. Do my hw in a hotel room, pay for a scanner, etc. I can't wait for this damn trip. I've planned soo much and so hard for this trip. It's ridiculous. It's insane. I wanna try new foods. Experience new things. Take TONS of pictures. I wanna fill an album full of these things. Even if nobody else views them, I want them for memory. I wanna be with the loml (that looks like a bed, and so does the word bed) for six days without worrying about his parents calling him at night. Or w/o my mom asking me to buy her a drink. Or worry a/b Vasiliy needing to be walked in the morning. So many things I wanna do. I hate waiting. I'm the most impatient person ever.
I'm getting caught up in school. Finally. I can't afford to fall behind. I gotta focus.
This weekend I most definitely will clean everything. I'll put Vasiliy somewhere so I can have more room to do what needs to be done.
Thursday, January 27
Wednesday, January 26
Privacy
I wish that Blogger had an option for private posts. With that being said, there are things that I wanna get off my chest... but I don't wanna name names, etc.
Idk why we're not friends anymore. Don't you think that if I knew it would have upset you this much, I would've ignored it, ignored it all. You mean the WORLD to me, and I do value our friendship. I don't know what else to say. We're not friends anymore, it upsets me, but I guess that's the end. I never would've thought it would've ended this way. I'm not going to throw things in your face stating I was there for you, etc., but it'd be really fucked up. I just wanna remind you that I do love you. Even though you hate me.
Feelings suck. Esp. when you gotta hurt somebody's feelings just to make sure that you're happy. Maybe my intentions are in the wrong place. In the end, I know that I love SKB. More than words can describe. Even the things I don't like about him, make me love him in all sorts of ways. Ugh. I guess I gotta see alla these people and tell them how I feel.
Idk why we're not friends anymore. Don't you think that if I knew it would have upset you this much, I would've ignored it, ignored it all. You mean the WORLD to me, and I do value our friendship. I don't know what else to say. We're not friends anymore, it upsets me, but I guess that's the end. I never would've thought it would've ended this way. I'm not going to throw things in your face stating I was there for you, etc., but it'd be really fucked up. I just wanna remind you that I do love you. Even though you hate me.
Feelings suck. Esp. when you gotta hurt somebody's feelings just to make sure that you're happy. Maybe my intentions are in the wrong place. In the end, I know that I love SKB. More than words can describe. Even the things I don't like about him, make me love him in all sorts of ways. Ugh. I guess I gotta see alla these people and tell them how I feel.
Monday, January 24
Omgah, the way things work
Broken laptop, new laptop. No internet fixed internet. One house phone. No time for anything, no I'm procrastinating.
I have a new laptop. It's definitely NOT the one I wanted, but it'll do. It's definitely better than what I had. I wish I could configure a few things, maybe I'll ask Stan a/b them later. School was put on hold since I didn't have access to anything. Vasiliy was put on the back burner since Jess was in town. My relationship took a tumble and he blew things outta proportion and I don't think he ever forgave me. Not to say I'm not to blame, but maybe this is just a word of the wise. I feel like even after alla that, and how may times he's done things that has hurt me, it'd be really fair for me to just up and leave since what he did wasn't nearly as bad as what I did. Which in turn makes me feel stuck in this relationship. Ugh. Things are getting better, but it's definitely one of those one step forward two step backwards type of thing. I wish the tables were turned and he could see the difficulty and the challenges he's putting me through. It's not fair that I'm always the one being burned because he doesn't stop to think a/b things. I wasn't always in a bad mood, but you gotta realize that certain things will affect me. Ugh.
Vasiliy has a new crate, and just getting it was an experience. It's so huge. I can fit in it w/ him. There were guys there that were so trying to holla at me it wasn't even funny. "Hey mama. You gotta boyfriend?" I point to Stan's car as he's driving up to get me with the cart and the big ass box. "You wanna take down my number just in case he's not treating you right?" "No thanks. He's doing an excellent job." "Why you color blind?" "What?" "Just take my number." STAN "Go return the cart and I'll meet you out front." My goodness. Now Vasiliy has hella room.
I've decided that this week my main project is to empty the area where my desk is, remove my desk, put my dresser towards that wall, and Vasiliy's crate toward the wall where my dresser is. If it'll fit and not cover the heater. B/c I don't use that desk. And that crate is just in the way of my life. So something needs to give. I'd put it in the spot of where the desk is, but that's in front of my closest and I don't want him to shed all over my clothes. We'll see. It'll take a hope, a prayer, and some big manly hands for me to get alla that done this week.
It's seriously almost February. Not to say that as only talking a/b my trip, but that means January is over with. This month flew by. I guess with alla Joi's games, the drama I've been having with Stan, the issues with Vasiliy, not wanting to be home b/c of parents.. It's just like I really don't have time to pay attention to the time. Now, it is almost trip time. what to pack? Is it gonna be warm? Should I bring lots of skirts and dresses? Or just jeans? Curling iron? Extra hair ties? Where will my money come from? When will me and Stan look at dog hotels? There are so many little things that need to be solved before anything over this trip. I hope this hotel has wifi. And shuttle service. Though it's a mile away, after walking all day in the parks, I don't wanna walk more to get back to the hotel.
What else is there to say? Oohh cakes. Just as a reminder; you can not have your cake and eat it too, even if you have two cakes. One cake is more than enough. No other type of cake dessert can be added to this equation either. Now only to make this happen correctly. I must say, things were a lot easier before. I gotta do this, to make myself happy. I may have to hurt other people's feelings, but it needs to be done for me to be happy. Me > you. Unless you SKB.
I should really go to school right now. But I kinna just don't wanna.
I have a new laptop. It's definitely NOT the one I wanted, but it'll do. It's definitely better than what I had. I wish I could configure a few things, maybe I'll ask Stan a/b them later. School was put on hold since I didn't have access to anything. Vasiliy was put on the back burner since Jess was in town. My relationship took a tumble and he blew things outta proportion and I don't think he ever forgave me. Not to say I'm not to blame, but maybe this is just a word of the wise. I feel like even after alla that, and how may times he's done things that has hurt me, it'd be really fair for me to just up and leave since what he did wasn't nearly as bad as what I did. Which in turn makes me feel stuck in this relationship. Ugh. Things are getting better, but it's definitely one of those one step forward two step backwards type of thing. I wish the tables were turned and he could see the difficulty and the challenges he's putting me through. It's not fair that I'm always the one being burned because he doesn't stop to think a/b things. I wasn't always in a bad mood, but you gotta realize that certain things will affect me. Ugh.
Vasiliy has a new crate, and just getting it was an experience. It's so huge. I can fit in it w/ him. There were guys there that were so trying to holla at me it wasn't even funny. "Hey mama. You gotta boyfriend?" I point to Stan's car as he's driving up to get me with the cart and the big ass box. "You wanna take down my number just in case he's not treating you right?" "No thanks. He's doing an excellent job." "Why you color blind?" "What?" "Just take my number." STAN "Go return the cart and I'll meet you out front." My goodness. Now Vasiliy has hella room.
I've decided that this week my main project is to empty the area where my desk is, remove my desk, put my dresser towards that wall, and Vasiliy's crate toward the wall where my dresser is. If it'll fit and not cover the heater. B/c I don't use that desk. And that crate is just in the way of my life. So something needs to give. I'd put it in the spot of where the desk is, but that's in front of my closest and I don't want him to shed all over my clothes. We'll see. It'll take a hope, a prayer, and some big manly hands for me to get alla that done this week.
It's seriously almost February. Not to say that as only talking a/b my trip, but that means January is over with. This month flew by. I guess with alla Joi's games, the drama I've been having with Stan, the issues with Vasiliy, not wanting to be home b/c of parents.. It's just like I really don't have time to pay attention to the time. Now, it is almost trip time. what to pack? Is it gonna be warm? Should I bring lots of skirts and dresses? Or just jeans? Curling iron? Extra hair ties? Where will my money come from? When will me and Stan look at dog hotels? There are so many little things that need to be solved before anything over this trip. I hope this hotel has wifi. And shuttle service. Though it's a mile away, after walking all day in the parks, I don't wanna walk more to get back to the hotel.
What else is there to say? Oohh cakes. Just as a reminder; you can not have your cake and eat it too, even if you have two cakes. One cake is more than enough. No other type of cake dessert can be added to this equation either. Now only to make this happen correctly. I must say, things were a lot easier before. I gotta do this, to make myself happy. I may have to hurt other people's feelings, but it needs to be done for me to be happy. Me > you. Unless you SKB.
I should really go to school right now. But I kinna just don't wanna.
Wednesday, January 12
Hello School
Hello AIPOD!! I've slightly missed you. You are giving me quite a big headache. I didn't think being enrolled in TWO classes would be this stressful, but surprise! It is. I have to remember what goes where for each class. I've almost posted things into the wrong class. I also have to remember to respond. This year won't be like the last. I won't half ass anything. I think my drawing skills are even a bit better, seeing as how I don't have to face anybody's critiques.
The hardest part of all of this is managing Vasiliy. I'm trying to keep him on a schedule so I can focus on my work and him fairly. He needs a lot more attention than I can give him sometimes. I hope that he'll learn how to be sufficient in a house by himself. I think with baby gates, he should be fine, since he won't be going into areas where he's not allowed. Hmm, maybe I should invest in those. It'll be a lot easier at the condo, imo, since it's cleaner, and there aren't a million things on the floor. I just gotta get his paperwork. Ugh.
I need a job. Yesterday. I'm not going to give up. This will suck, hella bad.
The hardest part of all of this is managing Vasiliy. I'm trying to keep him on a schedule so I can focus on my work and him fairly. He needs a lot more attention than I can give him sometimes. I hope that he'll learn how to be sufficient in a house by himself. I think with baby gates, he should be fine, since he won't be going into areas where he's not allowed. Hmm, maybe I should invest in those. It'll be a lot easier at the condo, imo, since it's cleaner, and there aren't a million things on the floor. I just gotta get his paperwork. Ugh.
I need a job. Yesterday. I'm not going to give up. This will suck, hella bad.
Thursday, January 6
It's really 2011
2011 is very difficult to say. It doesn't roll off your tongue like other previous years. Anyway, some things have changed, some thing haven't. Where to begin?
My Adventures over the Break were unbelievable. Thanks to my soul mate, Jess, she made everything a blast. From random house functions, to hotel parties, to clubs and bars, we had a blast together. I spent a lot of time drinking, enjoying the perks of being 21. I had a really nice time with friends during the past few weeks. It was a sad day in my life when she left. I made some new friends, reconnected w/ old ones, and got rid of a few as well. The quotes from the break would have to be "But my tank top!", "My car seat is broken!", "Wait, why did we do that?" and "She can have one more drink." It was fun. I wish Jess was done with school so we could continue w/ our adventures.
Katy was in Taiwan so she missed out on a lot of these adventures, but I'm sure she had fun. She had to have fun. She only called me once. I missed her terribly, but she is back in the country, so I gotta fill her in on alla these things. And I'll break her in to be a wing girl. She doesn't have to do much, just be there so I can go out. Ahahah.
My relationship with Stan has been rocky and I don't know why. I think after that long talk we had, we were good, but then... somehow something changed. I need more from him. It's obviously not going to happen anytime soon, even though I want it. I want a lot of things, but wanting alone won't change anything. I've been trying to actually work for what I want, but it's not happening. It seems like the harder I want something to happen, the more it backfires on me. Whatever is happening, I'm trying to change it. Over this break, I've realized I love him, and that I want him more than anything else in the world. I'm committed to him like no other, and it scares me, just a little. I made a grown up decision, and I'm proud of myself. So, he has a year left, as I think I mentioned before. I really hope something comes outta this year. And on a good note, our three year anniversary is next month. I'm super saving from here on out, gotta make sure I don't spend anything for anything cuz I need it all for the trip to Disneyworld. I'm so excited. Flight booked, room booked, itinerary planned, day by day, park by park. Down to where we should eat. I'm so excited for everything this trip. Six days, just with each other. I think we need this. It should shape our relationship tons. I gotta find my camera, b/c there's gonna a ton of things that I wanna take pictures of. I honestly can't stop cheesing super hard over this trip.
I've been spending time with Daniella and baby Beyah (who's officially one today! Happy birthday Beyah) and they're a cute pair. I can see how happy Daniella is when she looks at Beyah, and even though there is a ton of drama b/w Daniella and Noel, I'm glad to have Beyah's cute self. She's looking a LOT more like Daniella now. Yay!
My first quarter at AI is done and I'm happy with that. I wish I had a better laptop, and that I wasn't forced to use this. I'm trying to save alla my efforts and not use what little things I have just in case I have to redownload it, but it seems like I might just be stuck with this piece of junk. I didn't get the laptop I wanted for Christmas, which makes me sad. I really wanted it for school. I was talking a/b getting this laptop for the longest time, and didn't get it. Joi got her Wii, I got... a case for my Nook that Stan bought me. Ugh.
My Adventures over the Break were unbelievable. Thanks to my soul mate, Jess, she made everything a blast. From random house functions, to hotel parties, to clubs and bars, we had a blast together. I spent a lot of time drinking, enjoying the perks of being 21. I had a really nice time with friends during the past few weeks. It was a sad day in my life when she left. I made some new friends, reconnected w/ old ones, and got rid of a few as well. The quotes from the break would have to be "But my tank top!", "My car seat is broken!", "Wait, why did we do that?" and "She can have one more drink." It was fun. I wish Jess was done with school so we could continue w/ our adventures.
Katy was in Taiwan so she missed out on a lot of these adventures, but I'm sure she had fun. She had to have fun. She only called me once. I missed her terribly, but she is back in the country, so I gotta fill her in on alla these things. And I'll break her in to be a wing girl. She doesn't have to do much, just be there so I can go out. Ahahah.
My relationship with Stan has been rocky and I don't know why. I think after that long talk we had, we were good, but then... somehow something changed. I need more from him. It's obviously not going to happen anytime soon, even though I want it. I want a lot of things, but wanting alone won't change anything. I've been trying to actually work for what I want, but it's not happening. It seems like the harder I want something to happen, the more it backfires on me. Whatever is happening, I'm trying to change it. Over this break, I've realized I love him, and that I want him more than anything else in the world. I'm committed to him like no other, and it scares me, just a little. I made a grown up decision, and I'm proud of myself. So, he has a year left, as I think I mentioned before. I really hope something comes outta this year. And on a good note, our three year anniversary is next month. I'm super saving from here on out, gotta make sure I don't spend anything for anything cuz I need it all for the trip to Disneyworld. I'm so excited. Flight booked, room booked, itinerary planned, day by day, park by park. Down to where we should eat. I'm so excited for everything this trip. Six days, just with each other. I think we need this. It should shape our relationship tons. I gotta find my camera, b/c there's gonna a ton of things that I wanna take pictures of. I honestly can't stop cheesing super hard over this trip.
I've been spending time with Daniella and baby Beyah (who's officially one today! Happy birthday Beyah) and they're a cute pair. I can see how happy Daniella is when she looks at Beyah, and even though there is a ton of drama b/w Daniella and Noel, I'm glad to have Beyah's cute self. She's looking a LOT more like Daniella now. Yay!
My first quarter at AI is done and I'm happy with that. I wish I had a better laptop, and that I wasn't forced to use this. I'm trying to save alla my efforts and not use what little things I have just in case I have to redownload it, but it seems like I might just be stuck with this piece of junk. I didn't get the laptop I wanted for Christmas, which makes me sad. I really wanted it for school. I was talking a/b getting this laptop for the longest time, and didn't get it. Joi got her Wii, I got... a case for my Nook that Stan bought me. Ugh.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)